Love means…

A few days ago a friend quoted a line from the film, Love Story (1970). The film is based on the novel, with the same name, written by Erich Seagal. Ali McGraw, who plays the character of Jenny in the movie says the line: “Love never meaning having to say you’re sorry” after her and the male lead played by Ryan O’Neal had a lover’s quarrel. This movie is one of my favourite old movies that is worth watching if you enjoy a good love story. This morning, the rain is coming down outside my window, and mornings like this one are good for watching old movies while snuggled under a blanket with a cup of tea in your hands.

Amanda

Beauty in Mess

I took this photograph about a month ago near an old railway bridge. I found the pile of wood and the crack behind it to be interesting visually. There can be beauty even in the mess. Life is definitely this way especially on a rainy morning where this blogger did not sleep well the night before. Hope that all of you have a great day.

Amanda

Rainy Morning Thoughts

awakened way too early without sunlight,

gray sky’s fondness for me,

wiping crusty yellow sleep from dulled eyes.

black cat meows, rubbing ankles,

seeking subsistence,

blurry eyed I fill his dishes…

tea or coffee? where is my mug?

head wishes to return to pillow.

witness to gloomy, rain thoughts,

way too early in the morning.

(c) Amanda Wilson 2013

Speaking to Soul

I don’t know how to speak to you,

not since childish innocence,

confronted with darkness within myself

All parts denied or long hidden away

Until a ripping open of Pandora’s box

where only one important ingredient remained hidden

as it did not escape

dear Soul where have you been?

where are you hiding in the muck?

a golden orb that flickers still

can you light the rest of my way home?

(c) Amanda Wilson 2013

United States Marine and a Cat

Yesterday, I spent part of the afternoon drinking tea with my Mom and the television show “Must Love Cats” was playing on Animal Planet. A story came on about a US Marine who experienced trauma while on deployment, and a stray orange tabby kept returning to visit her on the military base. This cat became a constant companion. Military regulation in the US does not permit soldiers to bring back stray animals with them as pets. The story does have a happy ending, but you are going to have to watch the video to find out how it ends. My own cats have been an important part of my recovery, because animals love us unconditionally and do not judge us for expressing our emotions. My black cat, Isis, would snuggle up to me during the really rough nights that I was struggling.

Crumpled Paper

trying several times to draft my thoughts

into a letter or an email

crumpled paper; hitting the delete key

if you stood in front of me

words would catch in my throat

nothing escaping my lips that makes sense

normally I can write manuscripts

or speak publicly with eloquence

what is happening to me?

there is no language adequate

for this heart versus head conflict

deaf, dumb and blind

useless like crumpled paper.

(c) Amanda Wilson 2013

Not Running Anymore

Jon Bon Jovi’s song “Not Running Anymore” just had me reflecting from those times when I wanted to run away from my past, and the pain that I knew working through would be very unpleasant. There comes a time when the pain catches up to you whether you like it or not. It’s a much saner choice to work through it than to run away from it.