One of the many qualities that I value in people is how some can be so very candid and honest in what they say to you. I have a few close female friends who are considered blunt by some, and emotionally honest by me. As someone who has struggled to express myself over the course of my life; I greatly admire and respect those who can express themselves with wonderful honesty and candour. It’s actually very handy to have someone who cares about you enough to say, “Hey, you are being an idiot,” or “Honey, step away from those low rise jeans that make your ass look huge.”
Unconventional compliments are another way that good friends sometimes watch your back. One of the things that I am working on rebuilding is my self-esteem. I think that women tend to devalue their experiences and what value they have as human beings. We are wonderful caregivers to our husbands/boyfriends, children, and even to our friends. We do not tend to give ourselves the same level of care that we do to others.
When someone gives me a criticism or an unusual compliment I try to think about it before I get offended or upset as these can be gifts in disguise. Anna, in her wonderful candour, smiled then called me: “One resilent bitch. ” We were walking to go shopping when I doubled over in laughter, and started to guffaw quite loudly. Poor woman thought that she had offended me, but once I stopped laughing I explained to her that the compliment was very unexpected and much appreciated.
Generally, if one calls a woman a bitch it isn’t considered a compliment. Our society does not value women who are tough and strong. Despite that, yesterday I received the best compliment that I have in a very long time, and I would have to agree that yes I am in fact a resilent, strong woman. One of my favourite songs is in fact “Bitch” by Meredith Brooks, because it celebrates how complicated women can be and strong.
If you are a woman who has enough honesty to speak your mind, and remain strong despite what life throws at you then I toast to you.