Loving the Dark Side

Nobody is perfect; rather they are beautiful in their imperfections. It took me longer to accept my own dark side than it did for those who really loved me to do so. Unlimited unconditional love allows for the acceptance of the good, the bad and the ugly. Depression, anxiety and trauma have really brought out the ugly in me yet my husband didn’t run away.

My dating history before Marc was either abusive at worst and incompatible at best. Our relationship was first built on a friendship that grew through a long distance correspondence during my second year of university. We met through the drama club at our high school then became good friends. A quirky sense of humour and his kindness led me to develop a crush on him even back then. He wore a fedora atop his head, which he told me many years later that he picked up from watching Hudson Hawk (1991). This is a favourite film of his.

Our relationship is a masterpiece that is always in process. He did not run from my history, or try to “fix” me. Our journey has been one of breaking each other’s hearts then healing them as we grow together. He came into my life as a soul mate who has taught me how to love unconditionally. We both have different personalities yet we can work well together as a team when we are communicating effectively. The past eleven years has been quite the ride.

Kelly Clarkson’s song “Dark Side” talks about loving all of someone…the good, the bad and the ugly. Everyone has a shadow self, or dark side. For some it originates from a traumatic past, mental illness, addiction, or just living a difficult life. We are all deserving of unconditional love.

May all of you reading this have someone who loves all of you; including your dark side.

Namaste,

Amanda

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